Tonight was a scary night for us. Our oldest, Micaiah (7), misunderstood me when I told her she could go down the street and play with one of our neighbor friends. I was about 30 seconds behind her, as I was grabbing my coat, and I couldn’t find her when I walked out the door. I turned to the right, where she should have been walking if she was headed to our friends house. But she wasn’t there.
Then I turned to the left, not expecting to see her that direction since we are two houses away from one of the busiest roads in our area. But there she was…poised and ready to cross the two lane road at rush hour. I started screaming at her to no avail since my voice has been almost shot for a week due to the cold weather. I watched as she dodged two cars and made a bee line for the other side of the road. There were cars coming in 3 different directions. All I could do was cry out for God to help her!
She made it across and I ran to get her. It was one of those moments where you want to tell her to never do that again yet you know in your heart all you can do is love her and tell her you are so glad she is ok. After we got home, we discovered the reason she was going across the street. She has another friend in the neighborhood across the main road with the same name as the one in our neighborhood and in her little mind, she seemed to forget that I would NEVER let her go across that road by herself.
Needless to say, I was reminded, yet again, how precious life is and how we can get so consumed with our “stuff” and so distracted that we miss the gifts that are staring us in the face. When you lose a child you think that you will never forget this lesson. But it is amazing to me how quickly we can let life take over and the most important things (people) slip to the backseat.
I am also reminded that we are in a battle. There is a thief who is out to steal, kill, and destroy and I have been given authority over him and “no weapon formed against us shall prosper.” We will stand firm against his plans and continue to trust in the One who defeated him on the cross.
After my relationship with my heavenly Father, my husband and children are first and foremost in my life. I want to model for them the love of the Father and train them in wisdom. So I think I need an extra dose of wisdom on how to communicate to a 7 year old after this event! Any advice? 🙂 Thank you Lord for your protection!
A friend sent this to me on Facebook after:
Psalm 121 (The Message)
1-2 I look up to the mountains; does my strength come from mountains?
No, my strength comes from God,
who made heaven, and earth, and mountains.
3-4 He won’t let you stumble,
your Guardian God won’t fall asleep.
Not on your life! Israel’s
Guardian will never doze or sleep.
5-6 God’s your Guardian,
right at your side to protect you—
Shielding you from sunstroke,
sheltering you from moonstroke.
7-8 God guards you from every evil,
he guards your very life.
He guards you when you leave and when you return,
he guards you now, he guards you always.
And a great tip on parenting. Obviously, where life and blood are involved, the rules change a bit, but this is great advice for us all!
Let Children Learn From Life
March 12, 2009
Parents can sometimes accomplish more by allowing life to be the teacher. We all want our children to grow up to be wise. Wisdom sometimes means that kids struggle with life by themselves and then come out victorious. In order for this to take place, however, parents must give up the role of problem solver and take on the role of coach or counselor.
It’s a challenge sometimes to know when to solve problems for children and when to let them struggle. We don’t like to see our children frustrated or suffering. Sometimes though we, as parents, suffer more just watching our children deal with life. One mom said, “I can’t stand to watch my four-year-old tie his shoe. I just want to grab it and say, ‘Here, let me do it.'” But allowing our children to struggle through a problem to a solution or experience the consequences of foolishness often results in more effective learning than we can produce otherwise.
We can’t abandon our children though. When undue frustration builds or a situation becomes dangerous, we need to step in and help. Stepping in as a counselor or coach is the best way. Jesus used this approach with his disciples. He allowed Peter to walk on the water and fail but was close by to pick him up again. When the disciples failed at healing the epileptic boy, Jesus taught them a more complete way.
Some of the most valuable lessons come from experience. If parents can make the switch from rescuer to coach, children will learn more and develop wisdom. So the next time you see your child struggling, put on the coach’s hat and watch learning take place.
For more practical ideas for working with your family, consider the book, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
If this tip was sent to you by a friend and you’d like to continue to receive tips yourself, you can sign up at www.biblicalparenting.org.